Happy New Year- +45 Days Post Transplant

One year or  365 days, 525,600 minutes, however you want to define it.....guess what?  There is only 6 hours left of this decade.    Then it's a fresh new slate my friends.  Exactly one year ago, I was sitting at home with my family.  I was doped up on Vicodin.  I had recently had a cyst removed from my chest which was causing excruciating pain.  But I wasn't going to let that get me down.  At least I could be loopy with my  loved ones . My kids all wanted to stay awake for the ball to drop.  We all settled in the living room in front of the fire watching Ryan Seacrest.   Mikey and the kids were falling asleep.   Me, the one on Vicodin was awake, go figure?  At midnight I filled all the champagne glasses with sparkling apple cider. ( Ahhh, so long are the days freezing our butts off at First Night in Boston).  Well, at least Emily stayed awake with me.  We toasted the new year and went to bed!  

I can remember telling my friend Beth that my resolution was that it was going to make it the be the "Year of the Jeanie".  Yup,  I was finally going to take time out for myself.  I was joining a book club, taking my training to the next level of training for a triathlon, and making it a priority to spend quality time with my girlfriends.   

Despite some setbacks like the constant unexplained pain in my chest and then the broken sternum, that is what I did.  I spent beautiful winter days out in the woods with Beth and the dogs snowshoeing.  We also grew to love running outside in the cold with the dogs.  Perfect days to run were days that were 30 degrees or above.  And we had many of them!  Beth and I got out there everyday we could and we loved it!  I joined a book club and finally was enjoying reading.  Not to mention the wine and the incredible women I met. 

The winter despite the mounds of snow we got, seem to fly by.  I was enjoying everyday outside being active. We were all looking forward to spring.   I was getting a lot of substitute opportunities at school, Mike was very busy traveling even internationally.  In fact, he took a business trip out to Israel.  While he was in Israel, I planned a big surprise 40th Birthday at our house.  I pulled it off and actually surprised Mike, which is not an easy thing to do.  We had an amazing party here with the help of my brother who helped me plan the whole thing.  My parents from Florida even came out to surprise him.  We had such a great time toasting and roasting Mikey! 

The spring in our house means baseball, baseball, baseball with a little soccer too.  With four kids, our weekends are spent on the fields.  Mitchy got his first two home runs!  The girls played t-ball for the first time and Mike was the coach.  Playing with their brothers in the yard over the years, certainly paid off.  They both were great.  Cam joined the soccer team and became quite a confident player.  I finally took a weekend spa trip with my lifetime friend Suzi.  With the warmer weather, came more and more opportunities to ride and run.  My first Triathlon was on Mother's Day; however, it was looking doubtful if I would be able to participate.    I was recovering from a broken sternum and had a lot of unexplained bone pain, which prevented me from hitting the pool. I had just completed a few months of physical therapy.   But a week before the race, my doctor gave me the thumbs up  to do the triathlon.  Despite never really training for the swim part, I did it!!  It felt amazing and I couldn't wait to do my next one. 

Our lives quickly took a drastic turn on June 3 .  That was the day that I found out that the cyst that I had removed (which had grown back on my chest) was really a malignant tumor.  That phone call I received that morning at 6:30 was my defining moment in the year 2010.  My life stopped as I once knew it.  That  feeling of invincible strength, was replaced with absolute fear and sadness.   I will never forget the doctor telling me in his office that morning that now I was a cancer patient and that my strength would be tested in so many ways but that I would become a  cancer survivor.  At the time, all I saw was his mouth moving and all I heard was the word CANCER.     One week later a bone marrow biopsy confirmed that  my cancer was a rare and incurable kind.  Lucky me!

I did wish for the "Year of Jeanie", right?  Holy Crap this is not what I intended.  Could I take it back?  Why didn't I just make a more simple resolution like no eating sugar or no swearing. Holy %$&@! 

My life and the life of my family has been tested this past year.  I am blessed to be +45 days post transplant.  I have been given a new chance on life!  My energy level is incredible.  Christmas was beautiful.  Santa was more than generous to our kids and seeing their eyes and expressions on their faces Christmas morning was priceless!  The magic of Christmas was so present this year in our home.  As Mikey likes to put it, Christmas went on without a hitch!  I even got to enjoy baking cookies with the kids!  We had my sister and her family, my brother, my mom and my mother in law  all here for an incredible Christmas dinner.  I have spent everyday of the Christmas vacation, playing with the kids and enjoying watching them learn and love ice skating.  Life is fantastic!

This year I had my darkest moments.  However, it has also been a year filled with love, support and friendship.  Our family, friends and neighbors have been there us in so many ways.  I feel more loved than I have in my whole life.  I feel closer to my family and friends than ever. I have seen how generous and loving people, even strangers can be.  When I think of the past year, I do not see it as negative.  I like to think of all the obstacles we faced as opportunities.  Opportunities to see learn more about life and the people in our lives.  I do hope the "opportunities" in the upcoming year are less scary and less stressful.  But nonetheless, I hope to continue to learn more about what this thing called life is all about.  I now no longer like to look too far into the future.  Today is great.  Today I feel strong and my family is together.  I  know first hand all that can change in a moment's notice. 

This New Years I think my Resolution or my focus will be to get back in the Game, the Game of Life!  To enjoy each day completely and to continue to see obstacles as opportunities that continue to strengthen us.  I wish you all a Happy New Year full of Love, Happiness and Health!

Love,
Jeanie